Now that the annual Stanford fancy-dress season is rolling around (such as it is) with the usual Greek and class formals, the age-old question comes up: what’s a girl to wear? This question is both the joy and bane of my existence, and to answer it I slip on my H&M stiletto-heeled ankle boots and, carryall in hand, totter over to the Stanford Mall. It may not be the most exciting of shopping centers, but it has a Neiman Marcus and, for the moment, that will have to do.

First stop is a courtesy call to Nordstrom. As a store it tends to be below my radar, but when I do happen through its doors I always find at least one item worth the trip. Today it’s the 3.1 Phillip Lim Multifold Tank Dress ($350). Lim, a San Francisco native, has garnered more than a page or two in Vogue for his easy, elegant creations, and this one has Lim’s signature style written all over it. In diaphanous grey linen, it falls in wide rings to mid-thigh, its neckline scooped low for a flattering decolletage. Cute, but maybe not the right thing for a formal, unless you’re the kind of girl who likes to run laps on the dance floor.

On my way out, a flash of gold catches my eye: it’s the D&G Dolce & Gabbana Gilded Lace Camisole Dress ($545), strapless and glittering in regal gold-printed splendor with a black leather band around the waist. It falls to mid-thigh as well, but somehow it doesn’t seem so informal. Instead, with its gentle flare at the waist, it seems ideal to flatter the hips: a dress that’s good-looking, attention-getting and not too stuffy, all in one.

Next I hoof it over to Bloomingdale’s, where I encounter the Laundry by Design Strapless Charmeuse Dress ($295), strapless, with a sweetheart neckline and a cascade of black silk pouring down the front. I think it looks lovely on me, and although it’s floor-length it doesn’t come off as too theatrical or self-important. I swish around in front of the dressing-room mirror, admiring the way the fabric flows. Ultimately it goes back on the rack, but I make a mental note to come back for it.

On to Neiman Marcus. I dodge the cosmetics ladies and sales associates who circle, protectively, over the racks (why don’t employees in big department stores ever seem to like me? Maybe it’s because I don’t buy until things go on sale) until I find a selection of evening attire. The first thing I see is a blood-red Valentino gown, off-the-shoulder, its hem sweeping the floor and an order of magnitude out of my price range ($7,650). Not the kind of dress you can wear unless you happen to have a de or a von in your name.

I shy away and find myself looking at a frock by Yves Saint Laurent. A gentle, non-girly pink, it seems loose and comfortable at the top and pleasantly swishy at the bottom, where it grazes the knee. Though at $1,674 it’s still a bit much for me, I can’t help but think how understated yet completely elegant anyone would look in it, next to their overdressed friends.

I sweep out the doors, resisting the temptation to stop for a tiered black-and-red gown by Jean-Paul Gaultier ($3,520) which is simultaneously sophisticated and haute, but at the same time young enough for a 20-year-old. It is, I think, a very mature dress, both old and young, unlike some of the saleswomen, who give me the evil eye on my way out. No victory today, perhaps, but a trunk full of good finds.

That weekend I beg a ride from a friend up to the city and make it over to the new Barneys New York, off Union Square. It’s like Christmas came early, or, more accurately, like it’s just gone by: the store is still clearing out it’s glut of holiday season merchandise, and there are goodies for all.

First on my list is a green Kate Moss for Topshop dress which leaves one shoulder bare and descends to the knee in a sea of pleats and ruffles ($335, discounted to $169). I don’t know if I’d look like Artemis if I wore it to a formal, but I don’t particularly care. It’s a keeper.

Then I see a 3.1 Phillip Lim midnight-blue cocoon dress with a ruffled collar. Like seemingly everything else I like it’s only to the knee, but somehow it looks grown-up enough that it wouldn’t be inappropriate at a formal. At $239, down from $419, it’s nearly too good to miss. I have a vision of myself wearing it with black leggings and pumps — who says dark blue and black don’t go together? Phillip Lim finally scores.

All dresses described are also available on the stores’ websites.