At Stanford, it is very difficult to have a roommate of the opposite sex. The notable exceptions to this rule include co-ops and couples housing (which consist primarily of graduate students). This policy seems sexist in that it compels students to choose roommates of a particular sex. The Oxford English Dictionary defines sexism as accepting “the traditional stereotyping of social roles on the basis of sex.” In this case, the accepted stereotype is that men only want to live with other men, and women only want to live with other women.

Director of Housing Services Sue Nunan explained in an email that single-sex housing “is the cultural norm in our society and is also generally the standard throughout the University housing system.” This is an empty argument. Segregation based on race was also a culturally accepted norm in the United States, showing that norms are not necessarily morally justified.

Nunan further remarks that if certain rooms were designated co-ed, “some students may be forced to live in this type of housing even if this is not their choice. Students should not have to make a choice between living off-campus or living in a co-ed room.”

But students should not have to make the opposite choice, either. A person who wants to live with a roommate of the opposite sex should not have to move into a co-op, graduate housing or off-campus residence. Nunan points out that few students have asked for co-ed rooms. Most students, however, know that the policy only allows co-ed arrangements in these few places — if they don’t want to live in such places, they have to bend to the rules.

And who is allowed to live in couples housing? According to the Stanford Housing Web site, “graduate and undergraduate students who are married” and “students who have same-sex or opposite-sex domestic partners.”

Can’t we just claim domestic-partner status with the person of the opposite sex who we want as our roommate? According to the Stanford Housing Web site, “At Stanford, a domestic partnership is defined as an established, long-term partnership between two people with an exclusive mutual commitment in which the partners share the necessities of life and ongoing responsibility for their common welfare” (emphasis added).

So Stanford’s housing policy not only dictates the sex of our roommates, but also the kinds of relationships we need to have to be a real couple: “exclusive.” As someone in an open relationship, I find this particularly offensive.

There might be a myriad of reasons why someone would want an opposite-sex roommate. A woman might want to live with her male best friend. A man might feel unsafe living with another man. There seems to be no leeway for these individuals in the housing policy. To give Housing Services some credit, however, transgender students are given special attention in ensuring that they live with someone they feel comfortable with. All I ask is that the rest of us be given the same level of respect.

We need to re-evaluate our beliefs as a university. All students, heterosexual, transgender or otherwise, have the right to live with people with whom they feel safe. The current housing policy tacitly endorses sexism by curtailing our freedom to choose a roommate of any gender. I don’t think these sexist attitudes reflect the feelings of students or administrators, but I do believe that sexism is implicit in our housing policy.

A fair housing policy needs to give students the right to choose roommates of any gender. For students who don’t choose their specific roommates (like freshmen), they should be given the opportunity to specify whether they care about their future roommate’s gender. I ask that we begin a conversation that can move towards a more just housing policy.

Bharat wrote this week’s column. He and Vinni write about social justice, sometimes together, sometimes separately. Email them at bvenkat@stanford.edu and/or vpi@stanford.edu.